I’m currently reading “How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big” by Dilbert cartoonist Scott Adams. In the chapter on happiness, he identifies schedule flexibility as a key to happiness:
The single biggest trick for manipulating your happiness chemistry is being able to do what you want, when you want… Step one in your search for happiness is to continually work toward having control of your schedule.
Parents understand what I’m talking about. Most parents love their kids and are glad they had them. At the same time, kids remove almost all of the flexibility in your schedule, especially if you’re the stay-at-home parent.
…In your personal life and your career, consider schedule flexibility when making any big decision.
Based on where I am in life, this is solid advice. There are a couple of areas in my life where flexibility has proven to be a tremendous benefit. The first one is my job: I still have a regular corporate job to pay the bills, so I don’t have the freedom of the full-time bloggers to write from wherever, whenever. But I still have a pretty good deal at the moment: a job where I’ve been in the same group for a few years, a stable group where we’re all known commodities; where working from home occasionally is no problem; and where employees are expected to have personal lives. If I need to work from home one day so the wife can go to the doctor, no problem.
How much is this worth? A lot. Having had my fair share of bad jobs, I am sufficiently satisfied in my current job that I want nothing to do with recruiters. It would take a ridiculously unrealistic pay increase to get me to leave.
Another area of my life where I’m seeing more flexibility is my children’s schooling. We started homeschooling this year, and while homeschooling is more work it also provides more flexibility. I’ve grown dismayed at the trend toward more homework for younger kids in schooling these days (yes, they have homework for kindergarteners now), as it’s a lot of work for no apparent benefit (the opposite of how they do things in Finland). My wife and I concluded that we could do a better job of educating our children than any available schools could, AND that we could do it with less stress and busywork.
It’s still early in the process, but so far we’re happy with the decision. We have less stress in the morning and less stress in the evening. And from a points and miles perspective, here is one benefit I’m looking forward to: we don’t have to travel when everybody else does. We can schedule school for whichever days we want so long as we have 180 days of instruction. Or we can travel and have some schooling on the trip.
This benefit is purely theoretical at the moment but we’ll give it a test on our field trip to Asheville next month (I’m finally getting rid of those Club Carlson points from that promo a few years ago!) and then during our trip to Nicaragua a few months after that. Will we have a science lesson on volcanoes during that trip? Will there be lessons on Central American geography? You bet!
Obviously, career and schooling decisions are huge YMMV situations. I’m not telling you what to do or how to do it. But for those of you early in your career, I do recommend you keep flexibility in mind as you’re figuring out what to do with your life. One of the formative experiences of my MBA came during a mixer between us full-time students and a bunch of the executive MBA students, who were older and further into their careers. Several of them seemed really beaten down: they were working long hours, they didn’t see their families, and they were more or less trapped in their current jobs, or at least they felt like they were.
The encounter made enough of an impression on me that one of my goals in life is Don’t end up like those guys. So far, so good.
James from BNA says
this is fantastic, thanks for sharing
de says
check out the biltmore while in asheville…definitely impressive, even today.
pfdigest says
I love the Biltmore! But I’m going to wait a few more years before attempting to take the kids there. We’ll be hitting an apple orchard and taking in some foliage though. 🙂
pfdigest says
Thanks James! I appreciate the compliment.
Leana @Milesforfamily says
Nice post! Agree with pretty much everything. Kudos to you and your wife for doing homeschooling. I could NEVER pull it off. I lack in the “patience” department, no surprise there! I know some who have done extremely well at it, so it is possible to succeed and not mess up your kids for life.
Also agree on importance of flexibility when you have a family. My husband has a job that allows him to be home for dinner almost every night. This is huge, and those who sacrifice time with their family for career advancement will most likely regret it later on. Time is one thing you can never get back.
Everybody Hates A Tourist says
Great post. I wish more people felt this way.
If you’re in Asheville on a Friday night, there’s a weekly drum circle in a park downtown that might be fun for the kids. It’s not just hippie college students either, the whole community joins in. Pretty cool.
ES says
Great post! Tonight we celebrated my oldest’s 35th birthday (!) so I am beyond the days of morning rush and homework battles. I don’t think I could have pulled off home-schooling but the flexibility it allows is wonderful and the stress it eliminates makes life so much easier. Sure sounds like you have hit on what works for your family. Well done!
Mark says
Great post! You’re not in the NY area, are you? Because we’ve got a homeschool co-op going here that’s very much similar to the Finnish paradigm. 4 days a week at 5 hours, including weekly/bi-monthly field trips all over the city. Learning through collaboration and play, no tests and no homework! Run by likeminded parents who grew disgusted with the standard education model.
Just throwing it out there 🙂