Since it’s Saturday…
Do any of you remember those “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey” bits that used to appear on Saturday Night Live a long time ago? Here are Jack’s thoughts on money.
- If I ever get real rich, I hope I’m not real mean to poor people, like I am now.
- I’d rather be rich than stupid.
- I can’t stand cheap people. It makes me real mad when someone says something like, “Hey, when are you going to pay me that $100 you owe me?” or “Do you have that $50 you borrowed?” Man, quit being so cheap!
- I hope that after I die, people will say of me: “That guy sure owed me a lot of money.”
- It’s easy to sit there and say you’d like to have more money. And I guess that’s what I like about it. It’s easy. Just sitting there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money.
harvson3 says
And it’s his real name! I still haven’t ordered my copy of The Stench of Honolulu, his first novel.
MrWho says
“I can’t stand cheap people. It makes me real mad when someone says something like, “Hey, when are you going to pay me that $100 you owe me?” or “Do you have that $50 you borrowed?” Man, quit being so cheap!”
Who’s being cheap? If $50 or $100 or whatever the amount you complain is “cheap”, pay them. Instead you complain about it.
mjs says
Seriously MrWho?!
Do you understand the concept of ironic humor? This wasn’t even in isolation– how could you have read the other quotes, but this one set you off? Your thought process truly fascinates me.
pfdigest says
LMAO!
Andy Shuman @ Lazy Travelers says
That’s not for real… Is it?
pfdigest says
I’ve been wondering the same thing.
Seth R boothby says
r/whoosh
Handeyfandey says
For real… are you actually retarded,?