Welcome to my Lessons learned from remodeling journal. I thought it would be fun and instructive to share our remodeling journey week by week. I hope you can learn from what we do right- and more importantly from what we mess up.
Lessons Learned From Remodeling: Nobody plays their B-Side on Facebook
“Nobody plays their B-Side on Facebook.” I heard this recently on NCIS (which has gotten its groove back- thanks Trevor for the reminder). The sentiment is both simple and profound.
For you Millennials, I’ll explain. Back in ancient times records had two sides: an A side and a B-side. The A side was the hit. The B side was usually a throw-away song nobody played. Notable exceptions to the B-Side rule include Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive”. Do you even know of another song by Gloria Gaynor?
Today at the National Gallery of Art I saw a beautifully haunting example of how celebrities fall prey to this syndrome. This instant Marilyn Monroe let slip her B side speaks volumes. Richard Avedon caught it on film (and Vik Muniz shattered it into puzzle pieces). I find it more mesmerizing than any of her straddling a Subway grate.
I wonder if Marilyn Monroe were alive today if her Twitter feed would look like Kim Kardashian’s. I’d like to think not, but I fear it might.
I blame the selfie.
This will sound like (insert crotchety voice here) “Back in my day…” but the invention of the selfie has taken A-Siding to an entirely new level. I took advantage of a recent Jetsmarter promotion where they handed out free private jet flights from DC to New York to anyone who signed up.
Sure, I made sure a good shot (or three) of me made it onto social media enjoying the experience. But I also enjoyed the experience. The twenty-somethings on the flight took it to an entirely different level. They treated the entire flight like a photo shoot! iPhones and duck faces seemed to be their entire range of focus. It was as if it wasn’t documented from every angle, it didn’t happen.
I’ve talked a good game recently about avoiding FOMO but I fear that I’m guilty of perpetuating it in others. Over here I think we’re better than most at the “real life” part of family travel and real life. But it’s still heavy on A-Side. It’s not all sunsets and private jets even if that’s what is all over my Instagram feed.
There’s real life and then there’s real life.
The remodel has certainly stripped off the veneer of my polished A-side. If anything will expose your B-side it’s having your house uninhabitable for months on end coupled with illness and vermin. I’d share that on Instagram, but the lice just wouldn’t sit still for a selfie.
We all have that friend or family member who would rather die then let slip her (it’s usually a her) B-side. The one who seems to curate and merchandise every aspect of her life. The one who seems to have the perfect family and the perfect house and the perfect life presented in that perfect holiday card.
I have enough experience to peel back the onion when I see a perfect family photo. I imagine 5 seconds earlier the kids were screaming at each other and Mom and or dad were screaming at them to stop screaming. Flip the record over if what someone shows you appears a bit too produced.
We all have a B-side.
Every once in a while, it turns out to be a surprise hit.
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