Note: This trip report is by Lance Mannion, a friend of PFD who is rumored to hang out on Flyertalk.
I have had a very stressful past few weeks, as my startup company has not been doing as well as I predicted. My idea of offering in-home frappuccino making classes is a good one but I just haven’t found the right market willing to pay my prices…yet. Teach a man/woman to fish and they can eat for a day, as the saying goes.
My partner suggested I just “get out of town” and use my frequent flier points to take off on a dream weekend trip. Why not!? I found a first class flight from CHS-PHL with availability on US. Philadelphia, a historic city where Rocky was from! The idea of first class, champagne, caviar—just like I read on other trip reports—was just too tempting to pass up. I booked the ticket for a two-night visit to the windy city!
The night before my departure I decided to invite some friends out to dinner. Living in Charleston is a treat and we have the best seafood in the world! My favorite seafood joint is a place called Captain D’s. I arranged for all of my friends to meet me there to celebrate my trip. I got to Captain D’s an hour early to arrange a booth big enough for three people. The manager, Phyllis, couldn’t believe my excitement. Anyway, she helped me order a fish platter.
Just the way I like it: covered in ketchup. It really hit the spot, and I am a local-vore, so I was happy when Phyllis said the fish tonight was “cod or starling” but she wasn’t too sure.
The morning of my departure was pure panderlerium. My flight was at 10 AM. I called my mother at 8 to see if she could take me to the airport. She could not and said I should have told her about this earlier! $@&*# MOM! Now I was in a panic!
I grabbed my two suitcases and literally ran out of my door. Just then I saw my neighbor backing out of her driveway in her minivan. I jumped behind her and she stopped for me. Score! She was taking her kids to school! I told her I needed a quick lift to the airport.
Boy traffic was bad! The drive to the airport took an hour, and those screaming kids in the minivan made me carsick. But at least I was here!
Check-in was chaos. The grumpy agent told me I could only take one bag. “But I’m in first class”, I told her. Duh! No matter, I shoved a bunch of stuff from one suitcase into the other, and squeezed a few pairs of my jeans under my shirt. I left the bag just outside the airport door. Some lucky fool is going to score big when they take that suitcase home. But I wasn’t going to let that dampen my spirits.
First class means a world of privileges. I was able to board first, but as this was an Embraer regional jet, I had to gate check my bag. This jet had first class in a 1-1 configuration and the first cabin was made even more exclusive by a curtain that was pulled to separate economy from first. Bring on the caviar!
There was one flight attendant working both coach and first that day, so when I asked for my pre-departure beverage she told me to wait. Well! I pulled out my neck pillow, eye-shades, ear-phones, and my portable CD player. Then I went to the bathroom to change into my pajamas. I was set to settle in for this delicious hour and twenty minute flight!
The captain came around and introduced himself, then asked me to put my clothes on. That’s when the flight went south. Just when the captain left—and I think he was only the co-pilot—I asked the flight attendant for a mimosa, and again she told me to wait until boarding was complete. I have flown before and I know the rules—namely there are none in first class!
I asked the gentleman next to me if he had a power outlet and internet port at his seat, only to be interrupted by the same damn co-pilot asking me to put my clothes on. “Excuse me, I am trying to do some business!” I told him. “And I still haven’t gotten a mimosa!” I am a busy businessman, and I had to get on-line to check if I had any requests for frappuccino lessons.
That’s when the captain asked me if I would like to step out into the terminal to sort things out. “Absolutely not mister!” Well, after the captain and some guy from terminal security helped me back into the terminal the damned plane took off!
So unfortunately, I wasn’t able to go to Rocky’s hometown, nor did I receive a Rimowa amenity kit. But I had a lot of adventures and met some interesting people and that, my friends, is what travel is all about!
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